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Mispoes

Mispoes

Classic motorcycles are just like women: they constantly require love, care, respect and attention. If you don't give them that, you get more lazier than you can handle at the most annoying moments. Okay, if you know that, it will never happen to you. Yet? FAIL!

My good twin had received too little attention lately and he took revenge. He started to falter more often.


With all that hitting and bumping, the ride began to look like something that fell under the law on gambling. The engine started to falter more and more. It started raining.

I rolled out in a parking lot where someone was sitting on a bench next to a car. That was possibly the profit of that evening, because I had cigars and GSM on board, but I had forgotten my lighter. And if you can view your problems through the smoke of a cigar, then life is always more manageable.

I went to the banker to ask if he still had a car with a lighter. Such a car is the best way to never forget your lighter, but it takes a lot of clumsiness on the motorcycle.

The banker turned out to be one of the nicer modeled and was actually crying. While it was already raining. Because you never know what deep emotions are released when you start showing interest in crying women, I asked if she had a lighter.

She gave me a glassy look. The harsh lighting above her did unfriendly things with her face. I decided for some empathy. The emotional approach because women are so good at emotions. “I asked if you have a lighter. My relationship with my motorcycle is currently in a dip. So I have to have lighter. For a cigar. That calms down. Do you want a cigar too? ”

The crybaby gasped for air a few times. I was reminded of the carp that was kidnapped from the pond by a fundamentalist heron.

She shrank back. "Are you crazy or something?" Do you have to ask. You're crying in the rain. As if it isn't wet enough already. ”I shouldn't have said that. A disastrous, extensive relationship story came. Sjon de Mol would immediately have made an emo program out of it.

By the way, I heard a lot of "I" in the story. As a not really involved party, it is useful to respond to these kinds of phenomena by making consenting sounds and tilting your head a bit. Then it looks like you're listening. I learned that from Wammes, our dog. Guilty looking, you should learn that from your dog. Then you get away with everything for the rest of your life.

Sitting on your crotch licking is a lesser dog example. If you are going to try, keep the Rugpoli number to hand. In the meantime I still had no lighter, but something else came to mind.

Under my buddy I always have a hip flask cask strength whiskey of one percent or 65. For emergencies and disinfection. "Wait a second". I grabbed my first aid bottle, filled the cap and said: “Drink. That will make you feel better ”.

After the second measuring cap she was no longer sad but angry. “See you now. You just had to be reset. But driving is not that handy anymore. I'll put my moped aside, take you home and take the train myself if I'm not too late for that. And then you go into your basket and let the dick of a guy of yours sit comfortably. ”

“Cock from an ex-boyfriend? A guy ?! I can't even think of guys without getting sick! But I never want to see my bitch again! ”Ai. Apparently I hadn't really listened, despite my tilted head and nod. I was allowed to bring her home. She thanked me without giving me a hand. Did not take me to the station. Fortunately I was on time for the last train.

The next day I picked up my bike what the Flemish people call so 'a remorkje'. The coating in the tank appeared to have started for itself and bobbed into the gasoline in jelly-like sheets. But that problem was solved quickly.

14 Comments

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  1. Beautiful piece Dolf, when you release a novel. I have to have this piece read by my girlfriend, she doesn't like motorcycling. She had to laugh when I once told her that if I had problems I would come running like a knight in shiny armor on his white horse.
    Your piece proves that there are real motorcycling knights.
    Keep writing!

    • Thank you Barry! Motorcycling is the most important side effect in life. And in 'Men, motorcycles and (what) girls' I believe there are 100 columns. But they POD, and I believe there is sometimes a hiccup in the software. And of course we are knights. And every woman has a girl and every girl has a princess

  2. Hi Dolf, I laughed at a cramp, it must have been lying from A to Z, but that doesn't matter. (maybe your bottle of heart failure under the buddy seat was true). A good story does not have to be true, but always has some truth. Until the next powerhouse. Nick.

      • Hi Jan, Reality is generally overestimated. But if you keep as much distance as possible from smartphones and GPS, then a world will open up for you. Certainly if you are on 'old bikes' RECOVERY: authentically lived classics on the road at impossible times. This was Guzzi related. But you don't want to experience what happens when you drive an Ural or Dnepr 🙂

  3. What a wonderful short story by this talented writer (Dolf Peters?). Full of humor, unexpected circumstances, probably part reality, part the writer's fantasy. Nice facts for the somewhat younger biker / motorcyclist, in contrast to the somewhat longer riding 2-wheel connoisseurs, think from long (er) bygone times when Murphy, s Law was still heard regularly…. Also recognize anecdotes from days long past in these short stories. Have been driving for 47 years now. Read these stories again and again with pleasure. Thank you for that!

    • Day Fred. Thanks. Then we have traveled the same roads. No 'mobility guarantee and GPS', just hook up. I never got much further than that level, by the way 🙂 Let's keep driving, enjoy and be amazed

      • Thank you for your nice response back Dolf!

        And especially continue to write your oh so nice, interesting and humorous articles. A pleasure !!

        An example of how simple at the time a problem was solved:

        Drove with my wife 42 years ago with the HDCN during a Superrally in Nice through Bordeaux on m, n 1947 HD Knucklehead Chopper Suddenly my bike started to run on 1 cylinder ... After an investigation (spark plug caps / spark?), It turned out that the contact points no longer opened enough because the hard lip on the moving contact point over the ignition rotor that provides enough “gap” for the sparks was worn. Cap ignition off, screwdriver brought in, contact points adjusted again so that they opened and heat on two burners again. KISS. Keep It Simple System. Quote from Clarence ”Kelly” Johnson. The world famous aircraft designer of the Lockheed's secret Skunkworks who designed the Lockheed P-38 Lightning, the F-104 Starfighter, the SR-71 Blackbird, the U-2 Spyplane and other aircraft. Don't have to think about experiencing something like this now with all those High tech digital computerized, even self-driving and self-parking bikes today. Issie good !? Will he go to the stable (ling)? Have been building and driving HDs from the 40s to mid 70s for so long. So they never let me down. Reliable as a VW Beetle / Opel Kadett, simple, rock-solid and a real pleasure to merge with it. Just enjoy driving. The intention is that it remains a pleasure and does not become a burden. And so, a HD Limewire Electric Razor design without sound? NO WAY! Rest my case Dolf. Bikers don't grow old, they just mature…. Sincerely, Alfredo. AKA as Fred Chopper.

  4. If for the first time an old Belgian police engine is refurbished and that is then nicely sprayed with a paint that cannot withstand gasoline, you get almost the same effect. You learn quickly how to clean your carburetor and how to put a filter in your fuel line.

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